Counted Out Without An Apology

 

After a year of going back and forth with the Chicago Park District regarding the way I was pushed out of the coaching job I had at LaFollette Park, everything has come to an end. As of yesterday, I am no longer officially an employee.

I was given no apology for the park district's antics. Like older people used to say when I was growing up, that would have been too much like right for the Chicago Park District to do. So here I am unemployed again, as I have been on and off ever since I was laid off from the very last full-time job I had back in 2008. LaFollette Park was toxic in terms of environment (I learned that LaFollette was known as a "problem park" not long after I began working there), and I am glad never to have to set foot in that place again. Yet, that was the only job I ever had where I could truly tell people that I loved the work I did.

I played with the idea of volunteering again for the park district like I did for several years at Loyola Park before I became an employee. However, I have a bad taste in my mouth now that I know how the park district operates. Besides, I remember that Sahia, who volunteered in the program at LaFollette, wasn't respected nor treated right many times - mostly by staff - when she helped me out. I knew at least one of the parents was also acting funny towards her because Sahia is not Black.  And Rick, who was very interested in being a volunteer and would have been a great addition, bowed out because of the sabotage he saw being done to the boxing program there from within. 

Since COVID-19 began, the park district's boxing program has taken many blows. As of this writing, several of the field houses that had boxing classes don't at the moment. There was an attempt to have online boxing classes, but I don't think that went over well. 

So...what's next? I'm quarantining at home, as I have been for months. The fact that I'm diabetic doesn't make me a good candidate for hanging out and about. Unless I really can't avoid going somewhere, I don't. I'm glad for Zoom meetings and email. 

As for boxing, I don't know. I have to figure out another way to participate in it. 

New Rules For This Year

The car died on me in the middle of the street last night.  The check engine light came on, which is never a good sign.  Then the car slowed down.  I was able to restart it and park it near my domicile.  Luckily, I wasn't too far away from my home when that happened.  My budget is very tight, and there's a possibility that the car may not be able to be fixed, depending upon what is wrong with it.

Of course, that meant I had to ride public transportation up to LaFollette today.  My boss was not on the premises, but he sent a message that he did turn in a special event request -- to allow for a ring to be set up outside for June's boxing show -- to the area manager.  After I found that out, I went on up to Eckhart Park for the boxing coach's meeting.

I like Thomas, the head of the boxing program because he's not much for a whole lot of nonsense.  He explains the reasoning as to why some things happen, why some things can't happen, and he gets straight to the point.  We went over the agenda for this year.  I knew beforehand that the park district budget had been cut down, so there was not going to be much any of the coaches could do about demanding extra equipment.  There is a private donor who donates funds to the program, but as Thomas pointed out, those funds have to be spent carefully.

When I see the kids at LaFollette again, I'm going to push two things:  the Chicago City-Wide Boxing tournament, and the Muhammad Ali Award.  The tournament takes place every year in April, and I have yet to have someone compete in it.  It's a good warm-up to the regular boxing shows that start in the summer.  The way things are looking down at the gym right now, I would be better off talking the tournament up to the teenagers.  The younger kids aren't showing much interest in the sport -- something that a few other coaches at the meeting were grumbling about, as they have the same problem.

The Muhammad Ali Award will be given to the best park district fighter of the year.  Judging will be based on the fights a person has had.  There was also talk of perhaps giving an award for Coach of the Year, as well.

I also have more backup when it comes to parents using the boxing program as a glorified babysitting service.  That does not seem to be the case with the kids who have been showing up to the 8-to-12-year-olds' class so far this session.  But it has been a major issue in the past.  Thomas told the coaches to inform the field house supervisors and have them suggest to the parents to move their kids into other activities, especially if the kids appear to show no interest in participating in the class activities.  We were also encouraged to inform the parents that boxing is indeed a sport and that there are expectations of the kids while they are in the class.

Thomas also let it be known that showboating and general goofing around from fighters at the boxing shows was no longer going to be tolerated.  I think I know where that decision came from.  There were some very disrespectful fighters at a boxing show I attended during the late summer/early fall.  A few of the coaches had to check them on their behavior.  Any fighter who is dancing around in the ring, talking trash to the other fighter during the match, etc., will have points taken from them.

Ada Park has a new coach named Emmanuel.  The search is still on for coaches to run boxing classes at Eckhart, Humboldt and Scottsdale.  I hope those get filled soon.  It would be nice to have a full roster of coaches.

Coaching In Two Places

I was coaching more than I was working out at Loyola Park.  Marta needed help with a bobbing and weaving move that Alan had showed her the previous week.  She was a little frustrated with what she perceived as her slow progress, and she wanted to do better.  Marta practiced that move for the majority of the evening.  Alan told her he'd like to get her sparring at some point.

After weeks of mostly inactivity on my part, I was moving better while I was at Loyola.  I spent a lot of time on the double-end bag slipping and ducking.  When I returned to LaFollette Park the following day, I did some shadowboxing during the hour when the eight-to-twelve year olds are in the gym.  A lot of it I was doing to give James an example.  James is doing better, but he still needs to work on his footwork and general body movement.

I had a feeling I should check the class rosters.  Looks like someone slipped another kid into the eight-to-twelve year old class without telling me.  They also disregarded the fact -- again -- that the class was over the established limit of people that should be there.  I was glad that the latest kid didn't show up.  I'm in the middle of preparing whom I have on hand for the boxing shows.  I really don't have the time, nor interest, to deal with another person who is coming into the class nearly a month after it has already started.

The teen class is now full, and hopefully, other staff will respect the class limit (as well as the fact that the class is nearly halfway over) and not register anyone else.  Ben finally showed up to the gym, and brought along two of his cousins, Devin and Lacey, who are now signed up for the class.  Ben's father remained in the gym with them and ran them through a workout.

No adults bothered to show up for their class.  Instead, talky Elizabeth and her older sister Samaia decided to hang out in the gym to kill time until they had to go somewhere else.  Once again, I had to remind Elizabeth that she's not in the class, so she can't use the equipment (a conversation that I'm really tired of constantly having with her).  Elizabeth started talking about signing up for the class, like she always does, but she's not interested in sparring nor competing.  It was established back around the time the spring session began that her mother does not want her in the class.  Maybe Elizabeth thinks if she keeps bringing it up, her mom will magically change her mind.  I don't think that's going to happen.

I can accept the adults telling me they don't want to compete.  Most are just looking for a different type of exercise.  When I hear kids telling me they don't want to spar, they don't want to compete. . . .I'm sorry, but I wonder why they signed up for the class.  That's what the class is designed for -- to give youths the chance to show their skills.  My experience so far is if a kid is in the class for some other purpose other than competing, soon, I will have a bored, restless kid on my hands who won't have motivation to only do the workout.  A kid being bored and restless often leads to them disrupting the class which I'm not going to tolerate.

Maybe I shouldn't grumble.  At least I haven't had to deal much with the summer camp kids this time around, nor the wear and tear those kids had put on the gym last year.  So far, so good.

The Fraternity of Coaches' Meeting

Only Earl, Jaylin, and TJ showed up for the kids' class today.  Earl kept whining because he didn't want to spar with TJ.  Jaylin had already said he didn't want to spar, and I wasn't going to spar with anyone.  Finally I told Earl that he wasn't going to be able to pick and choose opponents in the event that he has a regular match.  Earl and TJ went around for two rounds without either of them suffering any major damage.

The teen and adult classes were canceled out because I had to go to a boxing coaches' meeting.  When I think that I'm the only one having to deal with certain issues at the gym, it's nice to know that the other coaches have encountered those issues at well.  We help each other with suggestions as to how to handle those issues as they come up.

The parents as volunteers issue has always concerned me.  I appreciate the help, but they aren't official park district volunteers.  I let it go when the parents were helping their own kids, but that can't happen anymore.  Sometimes that turns into the parents helping other people's kids. . . .other parents might have an issue with someone around their kid other than the coach.  So I have to figure out a way to diplomatically request that parents stand aside and let the coach run the gym.  If the parents don't want to follow the rule, the only option they have is to leave the gym -- and perhaps take their children with them.

Actual park district volunteers can no longer run the gym when the coach is out.  Tommy, the head of the park district's boxing program, told us, "When you're not there, the gym is closed."  I used to open up Loyola Park gym when Steve was absent, and later on, for Alan.  In some ways that is good.  If something went wrong while the volunteer was in charge, the coach would also get blamed regardless of the fact they weren't there.  But on the other side, if the coach has to be off for whatever reason, the participants miss out on training because the volunteer can't run the gym in the coach's place.

Tommy gave all of the coaches boxes of T-shirts to give out to the boxing participants.  Thankfully, Alan kept my box in his car for me so I could pick it up from him next week.  Otherwise, I would have had to drag it home on the train.  I still have T-shirts from last year.  Not every participant received one; too few people showing up at the gym on a regular basis, and fewer than that actually competing.  This year, I might be able to give more of the T-shirts out.

Sexism In The Boxing Gym

Coach James, who runs the football, basketball, and baseball programs at the field house, told me he had to defend my honor earlier yesterday.  A man who discovered that the boxing coach is a woman appeared to take offense at that.  "I applied for that job awhile ago!  That job should have been mine!  How they gonna give it to a woman?" the guy said.  Coach James told him that from what he could see, I was doing a good job.  "How can a woman teach men how to box?" the guy told him.

The guy showed up in the gym sometime later, giving me a long skeptical look.  When I told him I had been boxing since 2001, the guy seemed to fumble for a comeback.  Then he did what too many guys do, which is brag about what boxing experience he's had.  Uh-huh.  I learned a long time ago that many confuse briefly taking a few boxing classes before giving up with having a lot of fight experience.  Other people think the amount of street fights and schoolyard rumbles they've had constitute knowing how to box.

I'm used to the sexism in this sport to an extent.  But it irritates me all the same.  The guy offered to send some younger guys over to check out the gym and perhaps sign up for the program.  I appreciated the gesture, but he said, "I plan to volunteer, too."  Based on the guy's earlier comments to Coach James, I'm not so sure I want the guy as a volunteer.

Unfortunately, some men are always looking to undermine a woman's authority everywhere and at all times.  If the guy actually applies to be a park district volunteer and successfully passes the background check, I have a feeling I will have to keep reminding him who is the boss of the gym.  I already have my hands full dealing the kids.  I don't need to also have to explain manners and having respect for others to an adult.

What A Boxing Coach Wants Parents To Know

1.  I can only focus on the kids who are actually signed up for the program.  I'm not there to give free lessons and "try it out" sessions to the siblings, cousins, and buddies who have tagged along with the kids, but who are not signed up for the gym.

2.  I'm not a babysitter nor a playground monitor.  I can't watch the siblings, cousins, buddies of the kids in the program.  If they're not signed up for the gym, please leave them at home, or take them with after dropping off the kids who are signed up for the gym.

3.  Boxing will not automatically solve bullying issues.  In fact, it may escalate matters.  Also consider that most schools have a zero tolerance policy about fighting.  I do agree that people should be able to defend themselves.  However, it would be better to address bullying with your kid's teachers, the school administrators, and the parents of the kid who is doing the bullying than teaching your kid how to fight.

4.  I'm not going to deal with kids who present discipline problems to me in the gym.  I will bring it up to the parents at least once.  If I keep having to deal with it, and especially if I suspect nothing is being done at home to curb the behavior, I will strongly suggest that the kid be placed in another activity.  Please know that I'm not putting up with disrespect.

5.  Don't sign up kids for the gym with the idea of making them tough.  Some kids will, but others don't have the personality for it.  Know your kids.

6.  Don't force the kids into boxing.  Please ask the kid if they really want to take the sport up.  It is a waste of the kids' time to put them in an activity they don't enjoy.  It is also a waste of my time to try to teach them.  I will step in when I see a parent/guardian forcing a kid to spar when I see the kid is not returning punches, being injured, crying, etc.

7.  Make sure the kids are there on time.  When people show up late, people cheat themselves out of valuable training time.  The class times are what they are.  I'm not in a position to change them, nor make accommodations and exceptions.

8.  If the kid is involved in another sport whose practices take place at the same time, make a choice.  People can't train for two or more sports at the same time.

9.  Make sure the kid is showing up at the gym on a regular basis.  No one is going to learn how to box properly by showing up at the gym on and off.  I have other kids in the gym who show up regularly.  I'm not going to call home to find out why your kid is not there, because I'll be doing that every day.  I don't have the time to chase people.  If the kid really wants to be there, they'll show up.

10.  The classes are divided by ages for a reason.  I can't have an eight-year-old sparring with a fourteen-year-old.  I can't allow kids who aren't old enough for the classes to sign up.  Kids aren't allowed in the adult classes under any circumstances.  Kids need to be in the correct boxing class for their age group.

11.  People must be on time to boxing shows and tournaments.  Once the officials close the weigh-in, there is nothing I can do.  I'm not going to argue with them to let one more kid in, because everyone knew in advance when they were supposed to be there.  If a kid shows up without a mouthpiece, they won't be fighting that day.  I won't be carrying extra mouthpieces with me, especially when I know I gave your kid one some time ago.

12.  Respect the fact that there's only one boss in the boxing gym, and that's me.  I don't need parents/guardians standing at ringside calling out instructions over the instructions I'm already giving to their kids during training.  I don't need parents/guardians in the corners during boxing shows and tournaments giving their opinions.  If I know for a fact that the parents/guardians have had some boxing experience, I will gladly welcome their help.  Otherwise, it my job to coach.  Also, to male parents/guardians -- don't assume that I need help or worse yet, that I don't know what I'm doing because I'm a female.

When The Sun Comes Out, The Gym Empties

I've come to the end of another rough week.  I recently learned that Jack, a dear man who was a former member of the church I used to attend, has passed on. Closer to home, doctors have stated they can do no more for my step mom.  She's on life support at the moment.

As for the gym, the weather has played a part in low attendance.  Yesterday, the temperatures were in the 80s, and they are expected to be the same today.  Only Sanita and her brother Julius have been showing up regularly.  Between the two, Sanita is the more athletic and aggressive person.  She gets on her brother for not training hard enough.  "Julius thinks boxing is just boxing, but doesn't realize there's a workout part to it," she told me.  Y'all don't know how happy I was to hear that one kid in the gym understands that.

Star came in once during this week, and she told me she'll be missing some days due to a family vacation.  I remain mystified at Kishawn and Kemarion's absences since their dads were so hyped up about getting their boys trained in the sweet science.  I have a couple of kids who signed up, but have yet to show their faces in the gym.  Angelique appears to have dropped out completely.  Kody shows up on and off.  Just like Terrance, Kody appears to love the idea of fighting, but is not disciplined enough to put the work in.

Mike, a fitness instructor at the park, told me that I'll probably see better and consistent attendance in the adult boxing class when it begins next month.  When people have to pay for something, they tend to make an effort to be present.

I was told that a guy dressed in red was looking for me yesterday.  "I was downstairs the whole time," I said, wondering why the man wasn't directed to see me.  The guy expressed surprise when told that the boxing coach is a woman.  "For real?  This I got to see!" the man said.  I don't know if I'm in the mood to see someone who is surprised by that, but I am curious.

Having To Reschedule and Weed Out

I couldn't get the van, so my fighters and I could not go to the weigh-in for the City-Wide Boxing Tournament.  It's been rescheduled to next week.  To say I was disappointed is an understatement.  Over the past month, there seems to have been one setback after another in the boxing gym.  I thought I could breath a little easier after the painting and wax job was finally done, but that's not the case.

No sign of Tough, Talky, or T1.  All three of them knew they should have shown up yesterday to go to the weigh in (as did Angel and Nay-Nay, who didn't come in, either).  But it's just as well we have to go on another day.  Neither one of them want to fight; Tough and Talky just want to come along for the ride. Tough and Talky are signed up for another activity that regularly meets on the day the weigh-in is rescheduled, so they won't be able to go.    

I put in a phone call to Tough, Talky, and TI's home, but got no answer.  I left a message stating that I need to talk to their mom.  Based on their spotty attendance and performance in the gym, the kids need to identify why they want to be in boxing.  I've have already reached a point where I only want to deal with youths who are willing to make a commitment and put in the work required.  I can't keep starting over from the beginning with youths who show up on and off, nor with the youths who attend more frequently but who play around instead of train.  It's unfair, time-consuming, and disrespectful not only to the other kids who want to learn how to box, but also to me.

That's also the reason why I haven't reached out to the youths associated with that neighborhood community organization.  None of them have shown up for weeks.  I know that the work in the gym threw a lot of people off.  But even before that, those kids were seldom attending the program, and most were not paying attention.  I don't have time for that anymore.  If the workers at that organization come around to sign those youths up again, I'm going to insist that I talk to the parents of those kids first.  Everybody has to be on the same page.

Marine and his brother Curly sparred.  Curly got a bloody nose, and I rushed to wipe his face off.  Both Marine and I pointed out afterwards that Curly had his hands down too much.  But I have to give him credit.  Curly took those hits to the nose like a soldier.  Normally, he would leave the ring, but he stayed in for four rounds.  Those two continue to be my best bet for a good showing at the tournament.

Dealing With Consequences

This is a photo of George Manierre elementatry school, which is near where Cabrini-Green used to stand.  I attended pre-school there.

There was a kid in the boxing class yesterday to whom I gave a permission slip so he could get it signed by his parent.  His brother, an adorable four year old, stayed in the class too, so his older brother could keep an eye on him.  Two older girls related to the boys came in the class about an hour later.  One of them told me that the older boy can join the class but only after school grades come out next week.  The boy's grades have been down, and his mother does not want him participating in any after-school activities until the grades become better.

I was anticipating this scenario happening.  I'm in complete agreement with any parents and guardians who do that.  Boxing gyms will always be open, but education comes first.  The world doesn't need any more athletes who retire from their sports careers -- either by their own choice or because they have to due to illness or injury -- with nothing to fall back on.  If even youths do not choose sports as a career, education will serve them far longer than throwing a ball, running yards, throwing punches, etc.

Then I received news that another kid got into trouble at school.  His older brother didn't stay in the gym long because he had to go see about him.  I don't know the details, but I do know that the mom of the kid who's in trouble told her son he can't go anywhere for awhile.  Oh, well. . . .kids have to learn there are consequences for their actions.  I'm in agreement with that, too.

This is Oscar DePriest School, where I attended from 4th grade thru 6th grade.  It did not look like this when I was going there; the school has been remodeled.  I'm still debating whether I should pass out flyers for the boxing program there.  It's close to LaFollette Park, but not that close.  Actually, it is directly across the street from Columbus Park.

I have another kid in the gym, a girl who doesn't want to be in the class because a) her parents forced her into it, and b) she wants to do whatever she wants to do all the time.  "Only child syndrome", is how her mother describes her behavior.  Oh, she's in the field house when boxing is going on, but half the time, she's not in my class.  I don't know what she tells her mother about her whereabouts.  Her mother is always surprised to hear from me that the girl is seldom in the gym on a regular basis.  However, the girl's behavior hasn't changed.  The girl has started sparring; I'm trying to get her to understand why she needs to be in the gym more often and actually train when she's there, instead of playing around.

I perfectly understand kids not being able to be in the gym because of school and discipline problems. But I'm not always cool with the idea of kids having other activities that directly cut into gym time. Too many of the kids have signed up for multiple activities that all happen at the same time.  Early on, I did not make demands that the kids be in the gym every day.  But now I see that's going to be an issue when the Golden Gloves Tournament and the Chicago Park District boxing shows come around again next year.  It's going to come down to the kids having to choose which activity they prefer more.  I will not get a fight for a kid who is not at least showing up to the gym a couple of times a week.  Nor will I get a fight for a kid who's hardly training when they are there. Unfortunately, I have a few kids who are doing that.  I keep telling them they don't want to be in an actual match only to learn what the consequences of not training properly are.

Practicing To Coach

I brought a book called Boxer's Book of Conditioning & Drilling.  It's written by Mark Hatmaker. There are a few pages in the book covering punch combinations.  When I have down time in the gym (i.e. no youths show up for class), I practice the combinations.

Some coaches have told me there are some things they no longer do, like holding the punch mitts and sparring.  Some have legitimate reasons, like old injuries, for example.  But I'm finding I need to keep up on techniques so I can effectively communicate how to do them to the youths in the gym.  My focus on getting the moves and punches right during my lone workouts is more intense than it was when I was competing.  I count that as a good thing.

Sometimes during those workouts, I think to myself, I wish I had that focus when I was actually competing.  Might have made a difference.  But I doubt that it would have gained me more fights, especially being a woman in this sport.  I often feel a bit awkward only having had six fights during a brief amateur career.  But there are boxing coaches who've never had any fights outside of regular sparring.

I have to make a correction from my last post -- it wasn't Montrell who participated in an USA Boxing tournament in Wisconsin, it was Nate Jr.  Barry gave me the right information.  I saw Nate Jr. at a church service this morning.  He didn't win.  "It's all good; I'll get it next time," he told me.

Explaining Boxing

I stepped outside to see what was happening on the football field.  I'm not a football fan, but no one had shown up for boxing, and I was a little bored.  Plus, the gym was stuffy, even with the fans on.  I wanted to get some fresh air.

I learned that the field house's resident Junior Bear football team was not playing; some other Park District football teams were tackling each other.  After a few minutes, I returned inside via the field house's back door.  Two boys were sitting on the steps that lead downstairs to the gym.  "Are you the boxing coach?" one of them asked.  When I answered in the affirmative, they said they wanted to go inside the gym to box.  I had already put all of the equipment away, as in another 15 minutes or so, the class would have been over anyway.  But I changed my mind.  "Come on in, so you can see what it looks like," I told them.

I pulled out a couple pairs of bag gloves for them to use, and they took turns on the Cobra bag.  They asked a lot of questions about which punches were legal and which were not.  So many kids these days are used to watching hours of professional wrestling as well as MMA matches.  I'm constantly explaining what is allowed in those sports is not allowed in boxing.  Even after the explanations, some kids still want to do the illegal moves. The other day, one of the kids who was sparring, lifted his knee up to get another kid off of him.  "The referee will give out a penalty for that!" I told the kid. Other kids are always wanting to hit someone after they are already on the canvas.

The two boys told me, "boxing is fun", and they punched until they got tired, which wasn't very long.  Like I tell all of the kids, they'll get used to keeping their hands up if they keep training.  I told the boys to return on Wednesday if they want to sign up for the gym.  Tuesday is Election Day, and the gym is being used as a polling place.

I hung around the front desk after the boys left.  About ten minutes before it was time for me to leave, several girls who have been attending the gym on and off passed by the desk.  "Is it time to play boxing?" they asked.  Instead of repeating for the umpteenth time that people do not play boxing, I looked at my watch and said, "It's too late.  I told y'all the time when the class starts on Saturdays, remember?"  "Oh," was all they said, and then they ran off to do whatever.  So far, Saturday is the hardest day to get kids to come to the gym.  It seems to be easier to get them there during the week after the school day ends.

I forgot to mention that the radio in the gym started working again.  Then today, it stopped again.  I don't know if it's the speakers or the radio itself.  Maybe it will work again next week.  But then, maybe I don't need one in the gym.  No one seems to notice when it's on except for me.

Girls Are Different

The last time I was in the gym, two girls -- a seven year old and an eight year old -- showed up ready for boxing.  Their mothers expressed an interest in their daughters knowing how to defend themselves.  That's not a bad goal.  My mother was always on my younger sister and I (and my youngest brother to an extent) about the importance of knowing how to fight.

However, the boxing lesson didn't go as I planned.  The girls quickly grew disinterested in my attempts to show them how to stand and throw left jabs.  They preferred to play other games, including King Chase The Queen, which I haven't played since I was in grade school (but I remembered the rules of the game).  So our time together alternated between me showing them a little bit of boxing, and them playing schoolyard games. The girls had fun, and I hope they return.  The time spent with them taught me some lessons about youths and boxing, especially where girls are concerned.

The girl in the above video is about five years old.  Her punches aren't a joke, as you will see when you watch her work.  Some girls are going to walk into boxing ready to take on all comers.  But most others may not.  

Even in the 21st century, most little girls are still being sent the message that it is not ladylike to fight (and not to do most other things that girls supposedly shouldn't do).Girls are usually taught early on to be neat and clean, while the boys aren't admonished much for playing rough and getting dirty. Some parents become concerned if their pre-teen and teenage girls seem a bit too tomboyish for their taste.  Most recently, Mo'ne Davis, who was generating a lot of attention for her baseball playing skills in the Little League World Championships was asked by FOX News reporter Eric Bolling why didn't she take up other "female friendly" sports.

Coaches have to consider these issues when coaching little girls and teenage girls.  I'm not saying that a different approach has to be taken in teaching the sport.  Boxing is what it is.  But being aware of how differently society treats females, especially those who want to do something that is considered out of the "norm", is helpful in encouraging to pursue their interest, if they choose to stay with boxing.

Coaching This Week

There are posters in the gym that were up on the walls long before I was hired as a coach.  However, I needed to add some more pictures to the available bulletin boards.  I used to keep my old copies of The Ring magazine, but one of the last times I did a cleaning purge, I threw most of them out.  A few of the ones I kept as collectors' items I did not cut up.  But I did cut up the most recent copies I had for the gym's bulletin boards.  The Ring does feature stories about female fighters these days, but I was a bit miffed that I didn't have enough photos of female fighters to post.  One of my goals is to attract a number of girls to take up boxing.  It would be nice if they could see plenty of pictures of other women in the sport.  I still have to look among my stuff to see if I have any more boxing pictures.

I found out that I have to turn in a lesson plan.  I've been working on that for the last month.  The goal is to get across that conditioning is just as important as knowing how to throw punches.  I want to cut down on the "all I have to do is spar" thinking that I've witnessed out of people in other gyms.  In fact, I'm only allowing sparring to happen once a week, and that aspect of the training will not begin until next month.

I have a handout for parents which is on the staff computer at the field house.  It explains what amateur boxing is and what it isn't.  Most of the parents who have expressed a desire for their kids to be in the class are okay with their kids being in the sport.  The handout is more for parents who may uneasy with their kids wanting to box.

There's still not much equipment on hand for the kids who will start in the gym this week; more will come in eventually.  Luckily, boxing is not one of those sports that require a lot of equipment to get started.  There will be a big emphasis on shadow boxing and floor exercises for awhile.

I keep thinking about how I want the kids to address me.  "Coach" or my first name (or a combination) will be fine.  But I rather not be known as "Miss Hillari".  Makes me sound like some old schoolmarm in the Old West. I didn't mind when kids at the church where I used to attend called me that, but it doesn't sound right for the gym.

Speaking of church, I did try out a new one today.  If you've been following this blog for awhile, you know some of the difficulties I had at the church where I used to be a member (and from what I keep hearing, not much has changed).  It's been a little over a year since I attended regular services.  Afterwards, I had coffee with other newcomers to the church, a church member, and the pastor and his wife.  People were asked what they did for a living.  Everyone went wide-eyed when I told them I coach boxing.  "We would have never guessed that!" people said.

Thoughts About Being A Boxing Coach

Now that I'm the person running a gym as opposed to being a patron and volunteer, it has occurred to me that coaches need support as much as fighters do.  These are my opinions.  Feel free to comment and add other tips. 

1.  Hang out with other coaches.  I still call on Alan at Loyola Park, and keep in contact with Steve, who was the coach there before him.  I'm friendly with several Chicago Park District boxing coaches (Bill, Jack, George, Rodney, etc.), and I know a professional boxing coach (Fernando).  They can offer advice on how to handle different situations, share training techniques, as well as be sympathetic sounding boards when people need to vent. 

2.  Don't forget about others in the fight game.  Promoters, referees, fight doctors, timekeepers, managers, etc.  They are also good sources for advice and information.

3. Family and friends.  I've chronicled my late parents, my stepmother, my late younger sister, and some of my friends' negative reactions to me being involved in boxing.  But I have some cheerleaders.  Always be appreciative of whatever support is gained from this group and let them know what's going on.

4.  Books and DVD.  In an recent post, I mentioned that I've been reviewing some boxing books in my library to get ideas about how to help the fighters I'll be training.  There are also helpful DVDs available about boxing, in addition to other connected subjects such as strength training and nutrition.

5.  Prayer and meditation.  Don't laugh; it works.  Some days in the gym can be tough, and some people's personalities can be trying.  Pray, read your religious texts (Bible, Torah, Koran, I-Ching, etc.), meditate 15 to 20 minutes a day, take deep breaths, chant, count to ten, whatever it takes to remain centered and keep cool. 

6.  Exercise.  I remember Steve telling me that it's hard for a coach to get a workout in because they are helping others.  This is true.  If possible, get a workout in before anyone else gets to the gym.  If there is time at the end, do a workout then.  Otherwise, plan another time, but don't neglect the workout.  I think it's very helpful for a boxing coach to stay fresh on their skills because it helps when training others how to fight. 

7.  Be helpful to co-workers.  This is especially applicable if a boxing coach is an employee in a municipal park district (like me), or employed by a health club franchise.  Just the other day, a kid came up to the front desk and said the basketball gym floor was wet.  I could have just reported it to the attendants, but they were busy doing other tasks.  Instead, I went and got a mop.  I've learned a long time ago that always having a "that's not my job" attitude doesn't fly in any type of workplace.  The benefits of having a team attitude is that one needs help, it will be reciprocated. 

8.  Work in cooperation with parents.  The pastor of the church I used to attend didn't think that it was important to partner with parents in helping to make the youth ministry successful.   I never understood the pastor's line of thinking.  In my opinion, the youth ministry was not successful partially because of that.  If a boxing coach is training youths, they have to have good communication with the youths' parents and guardians and encourage them to be involved.  Parents should not be shut out of the process. 

When There Isn't A Win

When Andre won the super heavyweight trophy in this year's Chicago Golden Gloves, I was very happy.  It always feels good to be in the winner's corner.  But what if the decision has been given to the other fighter?
Like Barry once said, "It's hard to know what to say to the fighter who lost."

A lot of what can and should be said will depend on the mood of the fighter.  If they say something along the lines of, "Eh, I should have did this or that, I should have been more focused.  I messed up.  I'll have to work on my skills in the gym," then some gentle constructive criticism may be offered.  It will be heard.

But if a fighter is angry, different approaches have to be done.  The fighter could be justified about their feelings if the decision was clearly a bad call by the referee, the judges, or both.  Assurances should be made that the fighter did their best in the ring, but also emphasis the importance of not leaving the outcome entirely in the judges and officials' hands.  If the loss because of a fighter having not trained enough, not given their all, etc., immediately after the fight may not be the time to point those facts out.  Let them cool off.  But the very next time they come into the gym, go over what went wrong, and work with them to correct those things.

Recently, Alan was telling someone, Geniece, I think, about what happens at the Chicago Park District boxing shows.  He told her that the referees are quick to stop fights at any sign of trouble.  I told her how Alan had stopped a fight between Meg and I a few years ago.  "She never lets me forget that," Alan said.  I was angry when that happened, but over time I realized that Alan was right in what he did.  I was taking too many punches from Meg and not answering them.  However, it can be a touchy situation when the coach stops a fight.  There may be some frost going on between the fighter and the coach afterwards for awhile.  But the lines of communication have to kept open so the situation can be worked through and resolved so they can be a team again.

Above all, the main message should be that there will be another time to fight.

Coaching Thoughts

I've always liked this photo of Brandy and Alan, which was taken during last year's Golden Gloves boxing tournament.  Brandy is all smiles, while Alan looks like he's going to give orders to some associates later on: "Saul, Reuben. . . .it'll happen at the warehouse at midnight.  There won't be any slip-ups this time."

Now that the new year is here, I realize that it'll be time to renew my coach's license soon.  I originally went to a coach's clinic and got a license out of frustration.  I wasn't getting any actual fights for the longest time, then I was diagnosed with diabetes, and there went my chance to compete in sanctioned matches.  There was a point when I was going to walk away from boxing completely, then it dawned on me that I liked coaching.  I had been assistant coaching unofficially down at the gym ever since Steve was the coach, so I decided to make it official.

There's no school for coaching.  Every coach I know picked it up by working next to a seasoned coach and observing what they did.  It also helped that most of them had boxed, whether as amateurs and/or professionals, so they knew what all goes into that.  Learning how to coach also involves observing other boxers in the gym and analyzing what they do. 

Each coach has their own style.  Some are very hands on, stepping into the ring themselves to spar in order to better show fighters techniques.  Other yell orders and curse from the sidelines like drill sergeants.  Some are better in one-on-one situations, while others can work with large groups at one time.  I've done the group lesson approach from time to time, but I feel I do better with one or two people at a time.  Sometimes, I think I sound more coherent around a few people than with many.  I'm always concerned about either rambling too much or repeating myself unnecessarily, too. 

My mother used to say to people, "You know I can sing, so that means I know how to scream loud, too."  Sometimes, I use that same phrase on people, depending on the situation.  But I'd rather not scream and yell to get points across in the gym.  Most people tend to be more receptive to advice when it's delivered with an inside voice as opposed to an outside one.  But I'm an urgent encourager, and I try to show that I can relate when a fighter is trying to push through and master a concept.  A few years ago, Momo (Muhammad) was in the middle of a sparring session.  He had barely got to the middle of the second round before complaining about, "I'm too tired!  I can't go on!"  Momo was running from the other person, not returning punches, etc.  "I need to lose some weight, and I'm got arthritis in both knees, but I keep going.  Momo, you're about twenty years younger than me - you can do this," I told him.  He completed the round.

Watching a lot of boxing matches is another good way to develop an eye for what works and doesn't work during fights.  I don't mind listening to the boxing analysts while watching fights, but it might be a good idea to record the fight on the VCR, DVD player, or the TiVo, then play it back with the sound turned down.  See if your opinion matches up with what the analysts saw. 

I've helped out coaching kids, and I've helped out with coaching adults.  Which group is easier?  It depends on the people involved.  The younger the kids are, the more eager they seem to learn and the closer they listen.  Some teenage boys walk into gyms with the "I know everything already" attitude, however.  Some adult men do the same thing, and that is hard to work with.  Females can be a mixed bag.  Some are game to take on challenges from day one regardless of what level of experience they had before they got to the gym.  Others will recoil in horror as soon as I start talking about taking and giving punches.  Most women are not afraid to ask a lot of questions, and they will usually investigate thoroughly before signing up for lessons. 

Patience is valuable in coaching, because all kinds of personalities show up at boxing gyms.  The coach has to work with everyone, but they're not going to click personality-wise with all who come through the door.  When people in the gym are showing out, the coach can't always go there with them.  My father would often say, "I don't want to say anything, because I know it's going to start an argument."  But Dad would always ignore the filter and make his remarks anyway, and then the shouting matches between him and I would begin.  There's been a many a day in the gym where I kept my filter on in order not to make a tense situation worse.  The few times I did blow up -- on Igor,  and on Jordan, in particular -- I still made an effort to carefully measure out what I was going to say. 

I'd like to attend another coaches' clinic at some point.  Unfortunately, most of them are held way out in the 'burbs, and I can't get to them easily.  They're also usually held on days and times when I can't go due to something else on my calendar. I'm at Level 1, and I'm thinking maybe it would be to my advantage to move up to the next level. 

Chasing Something That Can't Be Caught

"One of these things don't belong. . ." -- did that song come from "Sesame Street"?  Well, it applies to the photo above.  Alan was wearing two different shoes on his feet.  "The right foot looks like a club foot, doesn't it?" he grinned.  He pulled a pair of shoes from home to wear, but didn't notice that the shoes didn't match each other until later.

"Wasn't that fight terrible?" Alan said, speaking of the fight Saturday night between Demetrius Andrade and a former fighter of Alan's, Rudy Cisneros.  Cisneros was knocked down and out with a one-two combination at the very end of the first round.  That was a rough scene to watch. The man had to be carried out on a stretcher.  I didn't see the other fight of the past weekend -- between Floyd Mayweather Jr. and Miguel Cotto -- but it was just as well.  I knew "Money" was going to win, just like I predicted that Saul "Canelo" Alvarez would win over "Sugar" Shane Mosley on the undercard. 

A lot of sparring went on Monday night.  Alan jumped into the ring with Andre Two.  Before he stepped through the ropes, he told me, "If something happens, come in with a baseball bat."  I laughed, knowing he was referring to the sparring war that Andre Two had with Jake awhile ago.  Andre Two wasn't connecting many punches in the first round, and when the bell rang, Alan told him that he could hit harder.  I watched carefully from the sidelines, just in case I had to call an ambulance for Alan.  Alan did hit the ground once, and he tumbled over.

Before Jake got in the ring with Andre Two, Alan told the both of them to "be nice".  The two men worked together as they traded punches. 

Andre One and I sparred for two rounds.  I kept thinking, "Don't chase him," because I knew I wouldn't catch him.  Alan must have been reading my mind because he told me not to chase him as the action went on.  Afterwards, Andre One told me that I nearly gave him a low blow.  I apologized.  I don't like when I do that to guys during sparring.  Honestly, I'm not trying to hit any guy there (without a good reason, anyway), but sometimes, my hands are too low. 

My third round was with Paul, Alan's boss at his day job.  Paul is taller and bigger than Andre One, but I managed to catch him with several hooks.  "See, doesn't she hit hard?" Alan smiled at his boss afterwards.  Paul was laughing that I was going for blood.  "I have my father's hands," I said in explanation. 

Jake and Paul had a good session when they were in the ring.  In fact, Paul kept jabbing Jake, and he got some good shots in.  They were pretty evenly matched up. 

I was highly irritated before I reached the gym.  Earlier in the day, I called Simons Park and casually asked if I could speak to the boxing coach.  "Oh, he's not in yet," I was told.  Further questions revealed that the guy just started there -- the person who answered the phone looked on the payroll list for his name -- and he had previously trained at another field house boxing gym.  I hadn't received a phone call or a reject letter from the Chicago Park District.  Really?

The good news is that I can continue to be at Loyola Park.  But the very bad news is that I've been pushed all the way back to square one of the game.  Do not pass go, do not collect $200.00, or any other money, for that matter.  I needed that job to make up for the gaping hole in my finances that's getting bigger by the second.  It never fails.  Jobs that I really want, the ones that I would enjoy going to every day, I chase them but never catch them.  But I always attract the jobs with difficult bosses, annoying co-workers and irritating customers and clients, and salaries that don't reflect what I'm worth.  I've had too many of those bad jobs (my current part-time day job is one of extremely few exceptions) since 1977, and I'm damned tired of it. 

"Think outside of the box," a social worker at a neighborhood community center told me concerning looking for a job.  The coach's job was representative of that sort of thinking on my part, but that didn't pan out.  I'm stalled at this point.  I'm fighting an ongoing match with a dismal job market where computers banish resumes to cyberspace hell if they don't find the right keywords, where "pounding the pavement" doesn't exist anymore, and I'm feeling the sting of age discrimination.  The score cards are not in my favor, and the referee -- who looks suspiciously like my dwindling bank account -- is about to stop the fight on me. 

After all that, I have to end this entry on a positive note.  The photo above features myself on the left, and my stepmother on the right.  The young lady in the middle is my niece Jalissa, a former Miss Black Illinois, who graduated last week with a masters degree in Integrated Marketing.  I'm very proud of her. 

Renewing At Gordon Tech

I went up to Gordon Tech High School to renew my boxing coach's license.  After decades of the Chicago Golden Gloves Tournament being held at St. Andrews Gym, it will now take place at the high school.  Allegedly, it is a bigger venue.  I only saw the library where the registration was held, so I have no idea how big their gym is. 

Danny, Kenny's friend, was there filling out his registration when I arrived.  Other familiar faces included Ted, Jack, and Rita.  Ted told the men sitting at the first registration table, "She's signing up as a boxer."  "No, not this time.  Renewing for the coach's license," I answered.  The process was painless and quick.  New this year -- coaches now get license books, just like the fighters.  "Just show them that book and you can get into the tournaments free.  If anyone says anything different, you tell them that the president of USA Boxing Illinois told you that you could," one of the older men at the table told me.  "Thanks.  Your name, sir?" I responded.  He extended his hand, and I shook it.  "I'm Louis Rios," he said.  He owns a well known and respected gym. 

I'm not sure which other boxers from Loyola Park may have signed up.  I'm assuming that if Alan didn't renew his coach's license today, he'll do it tomorrow. 

Volunteering To Fight

You may be wondering, "This chick has mentioned several times that she's a volunteer in the gym.  What does she do exactly?"  Well, I'll tell ya.

I'm usually in the gym before the coach.  Alan, like Steve before him, usually is late to the gym.  Unless the coach says otherwise, the field house staff can open the gym door for me.  The same rule is in effect if the coach is not going to be in that evening, and they have alerted the field house staff ahead of time.  That way, people can come in and work out, and the gym will be monitored by someone.  If the coach is not in that night, I make sure I'm the last one leaving the gym.  I alert the field house staff that everyone is gone so they can lock the door.

Once I change into my workout clothes, I fill up the water bottles.  The water is important to have available for boxers during sparring sessions.  The water is also there for those who are working out, but don't have their own water bottles with them.  I usually fill up my water bottle too, killing two birds with one stone.

If the timer is not already on, I set it for three minute rounds with a one minute rest.  Then I do a little cleaning up.  Nothing major like sweeping and mopping, but if I see stuff on the floor, or out of place, I'll pick it up.  I do pick up again at the end of the evening.  There's always gloves that have fallen off the table, towels laying near the ring, or stray mouthpieces around. 

If Alan steps out of the gym for any reason, I'll stay back to keep an eye on things.  When he is busy with the boxers who are sparring, I'm the second set of eyes watching everything else that is happening.  If people come into the gym inquiring about the program, I answer their questions.  I keep kids and teens from running through the gym. 

If someone needs help with technique, I show them with input from Alan.  Sometimes, I will help monitor the sparring, especially if Alan puts on the gloves to mix it up with one of the guys.  Sparring is not allowed when Alan is not in, and I'm supposed to keep people from doing that when the coach is out. 

When we're out at boxing shows, I may do any number of things: assist in the corner with the coach, keep an eye on everyone's personal stuff, record videos and/or take photos of the matches, assist with warming up the boxers before the matches, and whatever else is needed. 

I keep up with information about the dates when the gym session starts, and the times of the Golden Gloves Tournament.  Steve would often forget names of people in the gym, and Alan does, too, so I remember for the coach.

Four Guys and A Stiff Middle Aged Gal

Alan received a copy of the roster for the Winter session.  It appears that only one person had signed up for the gym.  "That's odd.  Usually, a crowd of people show up in January," I said.  Maybe people are waiting until the last minute.  But then, the price of admission went up over this year, so maybe the economy is to blame. 

Jamil, Ralphie, JJ and Ed showed up at the gym tonight.  "Are you going to spar tonight?" Alan asked.  I could have, but I figured the four guys were matched up with each other.  Plus, both my knees and my lower back were stiff.  I stretch each time before really getting into the workout, but that didn't help much Wednesday night.

JJ held the punch mitts for me.  I've always said that he would make a great coach.  He was working with Ed earlier that night on his punches.  "You haven't done punches in a long time," JJ said, noting the intensity of the punches I threw.  "No, I haven't," I said.  Alan's wrists bother him, so he doesn't hold the mitts for people.  I became a bit winded, and JJ noticed.  "You're breathing hard, and we're only in the middle of the first round.  Let me know if you're gonna die," he smiled.  "I'm an old woman, JJ.  It takes me awhile to work up the stamina," I laughed.  We ended up doing two rounds.

As I sat down on one of the ringside stools, Alan commented, "You're not huffing and puffing."  "I'm still tired," I said.  "But you went a few rounds with JJ.  That's good," the coach said. 

Ralphie and I were worn out doing an interval exercise.  It was the one where boxers alternate between holding the bag for each other and punching the bag.  My arms felt like they were going to fall off near the end of that round, which would be the last one of the evening.  Ralphie said he had a hard time keeping up the punches, too.  It's such a good exercise, however. 

I keep thinking about that 40-plus pounds that I need to lose.  I finished off the last of a half-gallon of eggnog earlier and said to myself, "Time to replenish the eggnog!"  Luckily, eggnog is only available in the stores during the last two months of the year.  It is also a good thing that I don't know how to make the stuff, or else, I'd drink it all year.  I don't want to make losing weight a New Year's resolution.  That's the best way to make sure that a resolution won't work.  I have to continue to look at it as a lifestyle change decision.